Today I was in a funky funk. A funkady funk funk, funk. And I was trying to pull myself out of said funk. I saw the sunlight and the warmth outside and I said, Yes. I will go forth. And thus it was. (Yes I am speaking like the Bible. What?)

And then I opened the door and found a package there, from a friend. A total surprise and a wonderful feeling. A book for me and a book for Noel, perfectly picked. And I felt — Okay. I will triumph over this funk. I will go out and give more, because someone gave to me, and it means so much. And it matters. So I will matter to someone today. Okay! Yes!

It helped a little to be outside. The sun. The brisk, yet not biting, wind. I went to the grocery store and just walked around a bit. And then came home, having given nothing. It appeared that the funk was in remission but not cured.

This evening, two friends came over who haven’t met Zoe yet. We hung out and talked and they gave us the sweetest, most unexpected gifts. It was so kind and generous of them, and again I felt — Ah. There is something to this giving thing. It means so much. It really, really matters.

Still, the funk persisted. But because of the totally unexpected generosity of friends, it was perfectly clear in my mind that giving is worth it. Even if my body was feeling low and down and poopa-dee-doop (the technical term), I knew that if I just gave someone something, it may not have the immediate effect of “Bling Blamo You are Better”, but that I would again be saying Yes to this whole big shenanigan, offering my generosity into the stream of all the other generosity flowing like blood in the body of the world. I would effectively be getting out of the little funky world I was existing in and extend to others.

So, I put Zoe to bed, put on my big white mom-like bathrobe, my slippers, and went outside in the dark. I’m sure I looked crazy, but so what. I stuck some money in a holiday card, and taped it to the inside of our mailbox for our postman to find tomorrow.

It says, To: Our Postman. Thank you.

And I really mean it.